LOCKED UP AND TIED DOWN
Xena and Gabby are debating the mysteries of life while Gabby gives Xena a backrub (ahhhh...she takes such good care of our warrior doesn't she?(G)) Some potential bad guys jump outta the bushes and Gabby does this neat cartwheel flip. I was very impressed with the Gabster. After beating the tar outta them (g) Xena finds out she's being arrested for killing some girl, during her warlord days, who was just like Gabby. Xena gives Gabby possession of the chakram (Is 'that' subtext? I'm not sure.(G)But it's nice to see Xena giving Gabrielle something that is so much a part of her (VBG)). Xena tells Gabby that she's looking for something to make her complete - maybe serving time will do the trick. Ahh.. .Hello?! Xena?! Anybody home darlin'?! You want to feel complete it's right there in your face sweetie. It's about 5'4'' to 5'6'' about 140 pounds (mostly in the toned abs(G)) and has blonde hair (well this week anyway(G). I think this is where the fanfic term - big, dumb warrior - comes in nicely (G).
Anyway, they go to trial. Gabby defends Xena and the judge asks if Xena has done anything questionable since her 'redemption' time. Gabby doesn't tell her about the time Xena tied her feet, dragged her across half of Greece and all the obsticals on it before getting ready to throw her off a cliff. No. She tells him nobody's perfect but Xena does have a perfect body so she stays with her (Okay. I made that up about the 'perfect body' but you gotta admit, it's a pretty good reason to stick around(g))
Gabby's mouth doesn't work this time. Xena is condemmed to Shark Island Prison. At the dock, Gabby and Xena exchange a fond farewell until some jerky guards steal Xena before she has the chance to stroke Gabby's face. I think that was our one shot at a kiss scene folks and those horrible brute guards stole it. Anyway, Gabby goes to the tavern to drown her troubles in a drink (G) while she plays with Xena's chakram at the bar. A guy comes in and says he quit the healers job on Shark Island and you can see Gabby's lightblub go on when he says they don't have a replacement yet. When Xena gets there they treat her (and others) badly. After she gets fed up and beats up the guards. We see Theasa, Valasa, Balasa. .. whatever her name is - anyway she's the one Xena was on trial for killing! She's the warden! They throw Xena into a pit with some ugly rats for being a bad girl. Around this time, Gabby arrives.
It appears the warden got away from the flesh eating craps when they chewed her arm off. Gabby looks at the wound that the warden still has. As Gabby works on the warden they talk about evil, redeption, you know. . .the usual small girl talk. (G) But as they talk, check out the looks that Gabby gets. The warden admires Gabrielle I'm sure. Perhaps in more ways than one. Maybe it's just me but I've noticed that most of the subtext we've seen in the last year or so isn't between our two ladies but other people they encounter. Just food for thought. Anyway back to our story.
Gabby finally sneaks away and gets Xena's chakram to her but gets caught. The warden isn't to thrilled about having her new friend betray her by helping Xena and Gabby gets a hard knock to the face that made me cringe. I love Gabby. They shouldn't beat up on Gabby. She's my bard (G) Have I mention that I love Gabby?(VBG) So now Gabby is going to serve as an example and is about to be hanged. As soon as the floor gives out the chakram breaks the rope and Gabby falls to the ground. Xena comes out and kicks butt as the prisoners start to revolt. Xena frees Gabby's hands and tells her to get the warden to safety because the inmates are going to kill her so they can escape.
Gabby and the warden run upstairs while Xena tries to bring order to the courtyard. The tough girl gang chase Gabby. She knocks them all out except for the leader who promptly throws Gabby against a wall knocking her out. But Xena shows up, kicks a little a** and brings order. Since Theasa, Valasa, Balasa, whatever her name is - is alive. Xena is free to go. The warden tells Xena that since spending time with Gabby she's no longer going to let anger darken her heart or something like that. Gabby tells Xena that Xena should forgive herself and Xena said she's doing just fine since she has Gabby in her life (ahhh). Gabby helps Xena up and they leave arm and arm together (another ahhh).
All and all not a bad ep. I liked the story line even if the subtext was low. The opening scene, however, was a delight.(G) As for my next report, Crusader - - boy o boy! For those who say subtext is dead, they might be right. Because this is some heavy duty maintext stuff if ever I saw it. Actually I'm sure with all the altfiction out there, I've probably already read it. (G)
Disclaimer: No rabid, flesh eating craps were harmed during the making of this motion picture.
Queen of Subtext